On the 3rd October 2020; the Excellence in Medicine Women Physicians’ Network had a refreshing session with Dr. Olamide Okulate, a physician, wellness coach, luxury concierge and CEO of Yellow Retreats. This session turned out to be just what we needed!
As female doctors, we are often encompassed by the double whammy of caring for family, as well as caring for our patients; and we end up putting ourselves further down on the list of importance. Because of this social conditioning, especially in a culture that places so much value on communal living, we are socially conditioned to put others before ourselves.
So how do you put yourself up there on that priority self-care list without feeling guilty?
In this eye-opening session, the different forms of self-care were discussed, with emphasis placed on the practical steps on incorporating self-care.
What is Self-Care?
Basically, it is anything done deliberately (and consistently) to protect one’s well-being and happiness. The key word in selfcare is Intentionality.
Since the steps involved in selfcare are seemingly minute, they are often overlooked and end up being emergency fixers for a lot of us, instead of being well-curated intentional routines for healthy living.
Snapshot 1: How to Practice Emotional Self-Care
To do this, you must develop a healthy relationship with your emotions. Meditation, mindfulness and journaling are helpful tools in ensuring the proper practice of emotional selfcare. Pay attention to the present moment, this gives you a better grasp over your emotions and helps you feel more in control of your emotional state. Allow yourself to ‘feel’ emotions coursing through you, don’t run away from them or drown them out with coping mechanisms like over-eating or over-shopping. Develop the bravery needed to face your fears, and with compassion too! Be kind to yourself.
Gem: Don’t feel guilty for prioritizing your own self-care, joy and sanity. A ‘beauty scavenger hunt’ can help you discover the little thrills and joys of living! E.g. beautiful things in nature- trees, free-flowing water etc.
Snapshot 2: How to Practice Physical Self-Care
As doctors, we find it easier to tell patients what to do, than to practice those same things. Physical Selfcare includes things like regular exercise (a gym registration might be helpful!), taking a bubble bath, a fitness class etc. It’s also in the little things like making your bed before going out, decluttering your space, wearing comfortable, yet beautifying clothes.
Gem: Moisturizers, bath oils, amazing scents that make you feel beautiful, wearing nice lingerie, going on a ‘beauty scavenger hunt’ shouldn’t be out of the question. Become comfortable with taking care of your body and looking beautiful.
Snapshot 3: The Practice of Mental Self-Care
Ever felt mentally fatigued? There are some activities you can engage in to stimulate your mind and sharpen your mental acumen. These activities include finding a new hobby that excites you, listening to refreshing general and subject-matter podcasts, reading books etc.
Mental rejuvenation is one of the best gifts you can reward yourself with on a regular basis!
Gem: If you find yourself going through the motions and often disinterested, trying out a new hobby might help you regain momentum
Snapshot 4: Social Self-Care- Your Relationships Matter Too!
The right relationships bring light to your soul, set your spirit on fire and keep you moving on the right track. Part of self-care is nurturing these relationships by scheduling get-away trips with your faves, hanging out with your girlfriends, going on dates with your partner etc.
Auditing your relationships is very important. Which relationships drain your energy without pouring back into you? When you notice this phenomenon, limit the exposure of such people to you. Instead, spend more time building the symbiotic relationships in your life, while consistently looking out for new relationships that nurture.
Gem: Fuel relationships that build you up. If a vacation is important to you, develop the self-discipline to save up for one!
Snapshot 5: How Do You Practice Spiritual Self-Care?
The practice of spiritual self-care helps you connect with your soul. While for some, spending time in prayer is helpful, other liberating steps include spending time in nature, outdoors, star-gazing and/or practicing yoga!
Gem: Connect deeply with your soul/spirit by practicing spiritual self-care
Conclusion
Do you value yourself enough to practice self-care? Remember: self-care is intentional work that you have to put into knowing and taking care of yourself. For self-care to work optimally, it shouldn’t be used as an emergency fixer when you’re about to suffer a major burnout. You are precious, deserving of your own love and care. So, own your self-care!
